Friday, May 18, 2012

On Moving Parked Cars

I don’t think I will ever understand people who move their parked car while on lunch at work.
Everyone I’ve asked has said something akin to their reasoning being “so it will be closer when I leave.”
This doesn’t make any sense.  As someone who is, admittedly, highly averse to exercise in any way, shape, or form, the extra effort expended in moving a parked car just doesn’t justify getting to my car sixty seconds faster.
Why not?  Here’s how it pans out.
On a typical day, you arrive at work.  Get out of your car, walk to your regularly scheduled employee duties, finish your day, then walk back to your car.  Two trips.  
However, if you move your car, your day looks something like this:  arrive at work, get out of car, walk to your regularly scheduled employee duties, detract valuable time (which could have been spent relaxing and/or actually enjoying your food) from your lunch to walk back to your car, move it 150 feet, walk back to your regularly scheduled employee duties, finish your day, then walk back to your car - again! - to go home.
This may sound insignificant.  Silly, even, especially to those of you who would rather prefer to see the other end of eighty and take your health seriously.  To those of you, I say, kudos.  If that had been presented by at least one person polled as an underlying reason, or even a fringe benefit, perhaps, of moving said parked car, I could accept it.  It does provide a reason to get up and move and do that whole heart-rate-increase thing (provided you walk faster than an intoxicated water buffalo, which seems to be rare in most of the places I’ve worked).  That, to me, makes sense.
Nearly doubling your foot traffic in an illogical effort to make things easier on yourself, however, does not.
In the corporate world, that’s called a redundancy and usually leads to someone (or several people) getting laid off.  Unless, of course, said corporation is based in America, in which case the person who engineered the plan is given a raise and those who actually have to do the walking are told to walk faster and farther for the same pay.

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